From an early age, I was told I had a temper. There are probably many reasons that caused me to have this flaw, but I can’t blame anyone for it. It’s a weakness I’ve struggled to overcome all my life. I don’t want to give the impression that I’m the Beast from Beauty and the Beast or some other uncontrollable rage monster. But I do not always make the wisest choices when I’m under stress.

Patience is a virtue I’ve yearned to cultivate in my soul. Understanding that patience is the solution to my problem, I’ve worked hard at developing it as an attribute of my personality. For some people, it seems to come naturally. I admire them. I’ve heard that I should never pray for patience because God will answer that prayer in ways I won’t enjoy. But I did anyway. And I paid a hefty price, as I discussed recently.

Last month, I had an opportunity to put my patience to the test, and something wonderful happened. I’d like to share it with you to show how much I’ve grown.

Planning Too Far Ahead

I recently did something I’d never done before; I put in an order for a birthday cake at Costco. That probably doesn’t seem like a monumental task, but it was a big deal to me. My wife wanted to celebrate her birthday in style with lots of guests, so only a Costco-sized cake would do. She’s quite shy, and this represented a big step for her in getting out of her shell, too. Thus, I wanted things to go as smoothly as possible.

This being my first time, I thought it would be a good idea to give the bakers plenty of notice. So I filled out a cake request a month early at the end of December. Her birthday wasn’t until the end of January, so I figured that would give them plenty of time.

Little did I know that there’s such a thing as planning too far ahead because when I went there on the day I had scheduled the cake to be ready, I found that they didn’t have it. Not only that, but they had no record of ever having received my request. I’m not sure what happened, if it got misplaced or I messed up on how I filled it out. Whatever the case, I wasn’t able to get a cake.

How I Responded

I could have gotten angry, but I only thought of that after the fact. In the moment, I expressed concern for the worker who had to tell me the bad news, assuring her that it was okay. I then asked if it might be under a different name, but when all the possibilities were exhausted, I humbly accepted that I wouldn’t be able to go home with a cake that day.

There was a sweet lady who was also picking up a cake that day that she had preordered. It was her first time, too. She was concerned for me not being able to get the cake I had requested, but I told her I was glad that she had gotten hers. It was a friendly interaction, and we were both edified by showing we cared about each other’s feelings. Seeing someone else succeed where I was failing helped me feel better.

Thankfully, I had had the forethought to order the cake a day before the birthday party. As a result, we still had time to put in an order for a cake the following day. This time, the staff was fully aware of it, and they promised to make sure it would be ready. Everything worked out perfectly.

They even gave me $5 off for the inconvenience. I think it was mostly because I was kind and patient the whole way through. Would they really want to honor a temper tantrum with a discount? No. Everyone desires patience, especially when things don’t go as planned.

What I Learned

The first day that I thought I was going to obtain a cake, I left without a cake but with several warm hearts and new friends. If the cake had been ready, I wouldn’t have had this wonderful experience. In the end, everything turned out fine and I got what I had come for. It simply took a little longer than expected, which was fine.

This experience taught me a valuable lesson. I learned that I’m finally becoming the man I’ve always wanted to be. It came naturally to be patient and kind. What a relief after so many years of work.

As I noted earlier, it only occurred to me afterward that I could have gotten angry. The thought of losing my temper felt foreign and foolish. There’s no need to express anger at good people who are trying to do their jobs and are just as confused as I am. I not only see the logic of that, but I also feel the wisdom of it in my heart. Such a calm, measured response naturally sprang from me rather than having to be consciously dredged up from somewhere deep inside.

I want to keep pursuing this kind of interaction. Whenever things go wrong, I desire to be patient. I’m finally becoming like the people I’ve always admired, the ones who can stay calm in any circumstance. That’s how they turn negative experiences into positive ones. And that’s how I did the same thing with this experience.

May we all be patient with each other’s flaws and weaknesses. I certainly have my share for others to forgive, though I’m working on them.

This is the Deja Reviewer bidding you farewell until we meet again.

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