Joke of the Week

It’s funny. When I was a little kid the first G.I. Joe action figure I ever got was a guy in a Hawaiian shirt named Chuckles. His special ability wasn’t being really handy with a gun, but being able to make his enemies laugh themselves silly so he could escape if captured. It seemed like a mistake for me to get that particular Joe because, unfortunately, I wasn’t very good at telling jokes for the longest time. But that suddenly changed a little while ago, and now I just keep coming up with new jokes all the time! So I’m going to share my newfound talent with you.

Need a good laugh? You’ve come to the right place! Each week I’ll present a funny little joke for you to enjoy and impress your friends with. You’re in for a treat!

February 28, 2017 – Old Hobbits Die Hard

September 6, 2016 – The Lighthearted Side of Braveheart

November 6, 2012 – Announcement: No More Joke of the Week

November 2, 2012 – Which actress endorsed a politician who was trying to get Detroit union members to vote for him? The answer is…

October 26, 2012 – What happened when a lady tapped on the shoulder of a man she thought she knew and said, “Paul, who are you voting for?” The answer is…

October 19, 2012 – Why was George Washington so concerned about everything he did in office? The answer is…

October 12, 2012 – What did the newspaper headline say when Gerald Ford decided to keep the former president’s spending cuts? The answer is…

October 5, 2012 – Why are political poll takers unbiased toward blue or red states? The answer is…

September 28, 2012 – Which state is every other state jealous of? The answer is…

September 21, 2012 – What did the Midwest state call the law limiting the size of soft drinks? The answer is…

September 14, 2012 – What is a union member’s favorite music style? The answer is…

September 7, 2012 – What container did Sarah Connor put the ashes of her dead love Kyle Reese into? The answer is…

August 31, 2012 – How did Moses describe the man who made root beer for the Israelites? The answer is…

August 24, 2012 – How did George Lucas get his inspiration for the Mos Eisley Cantina? The answer is…

August 17, 2012 – Which vehicle always finishes in second place in the Olympics? The answer is…

August 10, 2012 – What did Sean Connery say when asked why he was crying about his irreparably damaged bookshelf? The answer is…

August 3, 2012 – How did the movie reviewer briefly describe the ‘80s comedy that was a ripoff of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off? The answer is…

July 27, 2012 – Why were people so happy when a newspaper headline said most government officials were in favor of refugee immigration? The answer is…

July 20, 2012 – Why is Bruce Wayne a recluse? The answer is…

July 13, 2012 – What are an outdoor cat’s two favorite letters? The answer is…

July 6, 2012 – Why was Betty from The Flintstones so depressed? The answer is…

June 29, 2012 – If Peter Parker’s Aunt May got bitten by a radioactive spider, what would she become? The answer is…

June 22, 2012 – What did the mind reader say to start the bidding on a bag of French fries? The answer is…

June 15, 2012 – When two Choir Directors were dividing up a dozen Tenors by number, why did one Director think the other was being way too greedy at the outset? The answer is…

June 8, 2012 – When is a bully’s favorite time to wait? The answer is…

June 1, 2012 – What do you call a mythical milk company that’s located next to a cliff? The answer is…

May 25, 2012 – Why did Missouri’s slogan to attract businesses fail? The answer is…

May 18, 2012 – Which Norse god has the most ironic name? The answer is…

May 11, 2012 – Which city did the organ donor organization base its operations in? The answer is…

May 4, 2012 – What did the excited zoo patron say while awaiting the opening of the new sea otter exhibit? The answer is…

April 27, 2012 – What does the military file its random weapons under? The answer is…

April 20, 2012 – What happened to the law requiring bananas to have two outer layers? The answer is…

April 13, 2012 – Which two restaurants, when you put them next to each other, sound like grading on the curve? The answer is…

April 6, 2012 – What do you call the person you team up with to write poetry? The answer is…

March 30, 2012 – What does the tape player always sing when it gets to the end of a tape? The answer is…

March 23, 2012 – What does the political party, which only uses the letters A through Y, call itself? The answer is…

March 16, 2012 – When someone announced the leader of the Confederate Army would give a speech, why did people assume he would cover a broad topic? The answer is…

March 9, 2012 – What did the dollar bill want to go into the bank vault? The answer is…

March 2, 2012 – Why did the Borg give up on retiling their floor after they kept running out of tiles? The answer is…

February 24, 2012 – What did the nail say to the screw when it saw a hammer coming toward them? The answer is…

February 17, 2012 – Why was Mr. T’s son worried he would be returned someday? The answer is…

February 10, 2012 – What is a Canadian frog’s favorite game? The answer is…

February 3, 2012 – What did the tangled rope say when someone asked it, “Who are you? Can you help me?” The answer is…

January 27, 2012 – What is Batman when he gets home after a big fight? The answer is…

January 20, 2012 – What do positrons and electrons have in common with Walt Disney Pictures? The answer is…

January 13, 2012 – Which country sounds like an angry environmentalist? The answer is…

January 6, 2012 – If Charlotte’s Web was remade as a James Bond movie, what would it be called? The answer is…

December 30, 2011 – What did the communist country name the university dedicated to atoms and molecules? The answer is…

December 23, 2011 – Why was Jesus born to Joseph and Mary? The answer is…

December 16, 2011 – Why were Joseph and Mary so glad the innkeeper let them stay in his stable? The answer is…

December 9, 2011 – Who is Santa Claus’ favorite singer? The answer is…

December 2, 2011 – Why did Naomi (in the Bible) not want to send her daughter-in-law away? The answer is…

November 25, 2011 – Why was the TV show about the Periodic Table of Elements canceled? The answer is…

November 18, 2011 – How was the rock able to crush its competitors? The answer is…

November 11, 2011 – If Google ran an office-supply store, what would they call it? The answer is…

November 4, 2011 – What is the Queen of England’s favorite beverage? The answer is…

October 28, 2011 – What does an executioner read in the morning? The answer is…

October 21, 2011 – What type of plane would a werewolf fly? The answer is…

October 14, 2011 – If the sun and moon got together to make their own version of YouTube, what would they call it? The answer is…

October 7, 2011 – When David Lynch was offered the job of directing either Dune or Return of the Jedi, what did the person offering him the job say? The answer is…

September 30, 2011 – What did the anthropologist name his pet manatee? The answer is…

September 23, 2011 – If Christopher Nolan made a sequel to Inception and it was a romantic comedy, what would he call it? The answer is…

September 16, 2011 – When Mark Zuckerberg is giving a speech, what is his favorite app? The answer is…

September 9, 2011 – What is Bill and Ted’s favorite country? The answer is…

September 2, 2011 – Why is the number four so shy about talking to odd numbers? The answer is…

August 26, 2011 – Where do predators go to run? The answer is…

August 19, 2011 – What do you call an eco-friendly laser sword? The answer is…

August 12, 2011 – What would the Pillsbury Doughboy be if photos of him were constantly being put on magazine covers? The answer is…

August 5, 2011 – Why did Gandalf think Frodo wanted to send a ninja to Mordor to destroy the One Ring? The answer is…

July 29, 2011 – What did the plumber say when he walked up to his customer’s sink? The answer is…

July 22, 2011 – What do you call the President and the CEO of Pepsi? The answer is…

July 15, 2011 – If the author of The Shining made an information technology company, what would he call it? The answer is…

July 8, 2011 – What did the first sentence of the job description for Superman’s intern say? The answer is…

July 1, 2011 – What did the optometrist call his best sale ever? The answer is…

June 24, 2011 – Why was the canteloupe-eating puppy so sad? The answer is…

June 17, 2011 – When Fabio discovered he was too old to go out with women as often as other models he knew, what had he become? The answer is…

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