My apologies to Nate Hoffelder. He sent me an amazing idea for an April Fools Day joke, but I unfortunately couldn’t bring it to fruition in time. Instead, I have something equally amazing to talk about.
If you’re like me, you have heard rumors for years that a third Bill and Ted movie is coming, and you’ve dismissed them out of hand. It’s simply not possible to keep getting your hopes up only to have them dashed time after time. But now it looks like it’s finally happening. And it’s going to be called Bill and Ted Face the Music. The original writers Chris Matheson and Ed Solomon are back. Actors Alex Winters and Keanu Reeves are back. Everything is in place to make a solid final chapter in the saga of Bill and Ted. I am excited. Here’s what I hope to see in Bill and Ted 3.
More Time Travel
I completely understand why Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey downplayed the time travel aspect of the story to instead focus on the afterlife. The filmmakers didn’t want to repeat the plot of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. That’s perfectly acceptable – and I love that movie, by the way. It’s one of my favorite sequels. Enough time has passed that I don’t think it would be a problem at all to return to time travel as the main thrust of the story for the third film. It would feel like a welcome return to familiar territory if the plot were to revolve around a completely antiquated phonebooth showing up in the present day and whisking the characters off to a new adventure. Just think of the comedic possibilities this presents in the Digital Age.
Bill and Ted Meet Their Younger Selves
CGI is a wonderful thing. I know it has created plenty of cinematic monstrosities, but it has also been used in subtle ways to the benefit of already-great films. I think that de-aging technology, in particular, has come a long way, and it’s possible to do it well enough to avoid the uncanny valley. I say this because I think it would be wonderful if 50-ish Bill and Ted could go back in time and revisit their teenage selves one more time. In the original film, their first meeting with their slightly older and wiser selves is a big moment for them, and it cleverly pokes fun at the whole idea of time travel. I’d love to see something like this in the next film.
More Death, Please
I’m fine if Rufus is absent and Station is a no-show, but there’s one side character I really want to see again. I love the Grim Reaper, and more specifically actor William Sadler. He steals nearly every scene he’s in in Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey. Think of all of the hilarious jokes at his expense and to his credit in that film. He’s an absolute delight the whole way through, and I wouldn’t mind at all if the man with no tan has another role to play in the next film. Perhaps Bill and Ted’s time on Earth is coming to a close, and so they have to attend to some unfinished business with the Grim Reaper’s help. It could be along the lines of A Christmas Carol. Wouldn’t that be a touching and fitting end for the Wyld Stallyns and their scythe-wielding companion?
Speaking of scene-stealers (and long-time Ebenezer Scrooge performers), Hal Landon, Jr. needs to appear in Bill and Ted 3. He’s a great foil for Ted in the first film, and he does the most incredible impression of Keanu Reeves as Ted “Theodore” Logan in its sequel. Seriously, it’s a wonder to behold. Watch this scene, and you will see exactly why it would be a crime if Ted’s dad isn’t in the next film.
The Princesses Have a Part to Play
It would be a nice touch if they could get the original actresses to reprise their roles. But even if they can’t, Elizabeth and Joanna definitely have an important role to play in Bill and Ted 3. I love that their old-fashioned heritage is never forgotten, and it’s even treated respectfully in the first two films. Their chastity is praised, and they deserve to be treated as royalty. Plus, they inspired quite possibly the best joke in Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey. You know the one I’m talking about: “Medieval England, Iowa.” I’d like to see them partake in Bill and Ted’s adventure this time around instead of being sidelined for most of the film. Maybe part of the plot could involve their roles in history and what their leaving meant to future historical events. Or maybe they could just be there for their husbands in their hour of need and join in their glory and celebration at the end. After all, they are in the band, even if they are the offspring of a royal ugly dude.
Bill and Ted Get to Enjoy Their Legacy
I’d like to see Bill and Ted get a proper sendoff. They’re unlikely heroes who had no idea the silly band that they started in a garage when they didn’t even know how to play a guitar would go on to change the world for the better. I think their final years should be spent in the utopian future they helped to create. Once they’ve put everything right in their past and lived up to their full potential in the present, they should be free to move forward in time to live in a world that literally sings their praises day and night.
I’m Actually Excited
I haven’t looked forward to a film in quite a while. I don’t usually consider watching a film in the theater unless I hear great things about it. But this is different. I’m actually excited to see Bill and Ted Face the Music. I hope it will be good and that it will recapture the fun of the first two films. I feel optimistic that it will. There’s something about Bill and Ted that makes them a pure, untouched part of my childhood. I know I can’t go back in time and relive those memories, but Bill and Ted can, and so it’ll be like I’m living vicariously through them. Whatever the case, I’m ready to face the music.
This is the Deja Reviewer bidding you farewell until we meet again.
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